Enough Cup Holders

I've had enough of cup holders. More precisely, I am sick of hearing about them in car reviews. Every review published by one of the Lienerts, and every review published by Consumer Reports discusses the number, location, sturdiness, and size of a vehicle's cupholders. And sometimes, they even bring in gynecological metaphors.

Cars were meant to be driven. They are not restaurants with wheels. A car needs precisely two cup holders--one for the driver, and one for the passenger. Rear seat passengers don't usually need cupholders, because there usually aren't any. If there are kids back there, chances are they will spill their drinks all over your nice clean car, so they don't deserve cupholders. Most people drive alone most of the time--which means that one cup holder is usually enough.

Any automaker that designs more than one cupholder per seating position is wasting interior space that could have been used to hold more beer cases (Car and Driver) , pullmans (Consumer Reports), or whatever unit of interior volume you prefer.

Cupholders don't need to be large enough to swallow a 72oz Mega Slurp. Think of it as automotive calorie control. Cupholders should be large enough to hold a large foam cup of coffee or a regular 12oz soda can. Most cupholders are used as loose change collectors, anyway, and some of them even do duty as ashtrays.

Cupholders that fold away, like delicate plastic origami (Volvo, Saab, Subaru...) are cool because they can get out of the way when you don't need them. So what if they are "flimsy"--don't try to put a 72oz Mega Slurp in them, and they will be fine.

Let's hear more about performance, sound, ride quality, material quality, and build quality. Enough about cupholders.